Are you the roommate from hell? How to help the Philippines survive with you walking around: A young Filipino guide to living in modern times

Are you the roommate from hell?
How to help the Philippines survive with you walking around: A young Filipino guide to living in modern times II

AKA "Stay away from my cheese!"

At least if you’re from the lower to middle class citizens of our dear forsaken country then at one time or the other, you would have experienced sharing a room with perfect strangers.

Just like family, we can’t expect them to behave as we want them to and most of the time we don’t choose them. I remember very well having different roommates in college since I’ve lived practically in the campus dormitory guarded by nuns and middle-aged women who lacked sex. I lived with the dreaded 9PM curfew and strange to insane roommate and dorm mates.

That is why in our modern lives, now that we are working and have to deal with other people who shares our room, we need to draw the line on how far we can go so as to appear well behaved and didn’t spawn from hell.

Your guide to leaving your roommates alive and in one piece.

Cleaning won't hurt

Food
If you notice that the oranges in the fridge now have an image of a skull with crossed bones and a word “poison” embedded on its skin, it means you better stop eating your roommate’s food and get your own. Your roommates can’t help but notice a sudden decrease on his or her food supply and your roomie knew you’re the culprit. This is also a nice way to avoid confrontation.


Pets
We know you love your pet very much that there are times you just can’t part with them. If you don’t want your pet to end up as pulutan then keep them somewhere else, they may be cute but they are awfully annoying most of the time especially when they poop everywhere and you don’t even pick up or clean after them. Never keep pets even if they are rodents or fishes.

Vermin
Yes we hate them and though we are trained to squish and kill those little critters on the spot, spraying insect killers when your roommates are in the same room is just crass. You might as well slit their throats when their sleeping.
Bug Sprays are fatal to humans to and it is very well indicated on the can that these sprays should be utilized in a closed room with no humans around.
People died this way so unless that’s what you want then spray when they’re away.

To be continued…