Thursday, April 7, 2011

Have we met before?

What if we have met in a bar or a library or a place we’ve both forgotten, went home together and had a night that was scarcely remembered and eventually erased in our memories and now, dear me, have met again in a new setting and the only thing we both recall was… we’ve met before…

Let's drink... We don't exist.

I took the bite size apple that was pierced by a small fork to my mouth and chewed, troubled. My brows curled on my forehead as I looked at this woman before me with thick black framed glasses, holding a plate of fruits and eating by my side. That was the feeling, that strange feeling of knowing you’ve met her before but you couldn’t just keep it alone to yourself because in some twisted event, she too felt the same way.

I could have avoided it in the beginning but when the moment our eyes met it was as though the moment froze and out of unconscious behavior we both reacted awkwardly. It was a ghost of someone you knew but don’t remember at all.

I broke the icy environment by saying “Have we met before?” the glassy ice exploded into millions of tiny little fragments. Always the brave soul, I am.
“I believe so, I don’t know… I don’t know where and when…” she replied. Strange, that I too, don’t exactly know where and when and how.
So we started asking each other’s name, ringing a bell at the back of my head that perhaps have echoed to the passages of her ears as well.
“How… how was the cheerleading thing?” I asked assuming she was the performance artist I often meet during art exhibits.
“Uhh… what? No, I’m not a cheerleader. Perhaps we’ve met in a book launch?” she asked
“This is the first book launch I’ve gone to. So you’re not the performance artist.” I said.

She laughed quietly “I’m afraid not,” she said and asked me if I’ve been to this place, that I can’t recall anymore but I know my answer was no. We asked where we lived, studied and worked. None of them were a possibility of ever meeting, awfully strange that we know each other or at least felt that way.
“Did,” I started “Did we meet in a bar? Do you go to Bed Malate?” I asked coyly
She smiled “No, I don’t think we met that way…” we were thinking the same thing, (refer to the first paragraph of this blogpost)
I gave a sigh of relief “That’s great, I don’t usually go to bars,” I smiled embarrassed “But if we have met somewhere that way I don’t think I could forgive myself and would most probably throw myself to the Pasig river…”
The balcony of Powerbooks overlooked the tranquil ponds and plants of Greenbelt 4 under the warm but fainting sunset of the day.
“Maybe we’ve never met before… perhaps we just feel that way.” I said, staring and absorbed in observing the falling leaves that canopied the balcony.
“I think so too…” she said, eating her fruits.

“Or, we’ve met in the past life?” I laughed at my suggested idea
Her eyes widened “That could be a good possibility!” she said
We both laughed, I finished my fruits and she went to talk to her friends which one of them was my mentor.
I placed my plate down and gave my farewell to my mentor.

“You’ve met her before?” he asked me
“Oh, ahh… perhaps. Neither of us remembered.” I admitted
She smiled. “She works for (the biggest bookstore in the country)” my mentor said.
“That’s nice.” I remarked
“Now, Veronica is a fiction writer. Her books would have to go through you before it’s out in the market” he said
“Really? That’s interesting” she said
I said I was going and we exchanged calling cards. “A book buyer for fiction and literature?” I said reading aloud her card.
We shook hands and I left, boggled.

The event reminded me of Eternal Sunshine in the Spotless mind and this song...

Recently I have been feeling this sort of High-ness. When I told my friend about it she asked “You meditate right? How often do you meditate?”

“Every day at least twice and at long intervals…” I answered “It’s been going on for more than a week now. Earlier when I was riding the bus, I felt that my serotonin levels were abnormally high and I was… blissfully swaying in the bus.” I laughed.

“Wow, more than a week! That’s long, well you meditate for hours anyway. Meditation does that. Gives you a natural high similar to marijuana but better” she said.
“Oh..” I said… 

Starting that day (Which was only last Saturday) I abstained from meditating. I wanted to know how I would normally be feeling but when I am idle, I automatically go this state of meditation so I break away. Then again, I haven’t meditated much this week, only shorter and brief ones. 

Vegan Powers alright... 

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